if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
FUCK WHALES
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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