That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
