how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
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