you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Randomize
