i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
