need another drink. this is the easiest way
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Randomize