Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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