His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
