We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize