My friends, they love my intelligence
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Randomize