There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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