are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize