Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
