i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize
