So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize