This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Randomize