Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
