Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Still dying that you shit outside
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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