Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(970): View more from Colorado

The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"

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(361): View more from Texas

Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".

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(757): View more from Virginia

I understand Curling. That high.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.

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(408): View more from California

Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together

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(909): View more from California

I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.

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