You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
