too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
