Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
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