so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Barsexuality is the new black.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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