she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
