I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
