I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
