The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize