let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Found your dick twin last night
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
as a side note pls kill me
Randomize
