Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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