Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
