8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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