if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
