what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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