I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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