Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I need a burrito and a hug.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
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