I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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