She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
