So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
