sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
