ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize