Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
