Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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