dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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