She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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