i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
we're making bets on your personal life
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Randomize
