We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
