So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
