I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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