Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
