AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
We need to rekindle our bromance
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
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